Sunday, May 29, 2011

Home of Champions

Well, thanks to Dirk (pictured) and the rest of the Mavericks, in less than a calender year, Dallas/Fort Worth will see three of the four championships played in our backyard.

It all started last October when the Texas Rangers went on a magical run through the playoffs to win the American League championship and follow that up with their first appearance in the World Series. Of course this was also the first time they had ever even won a series in the playoffs. So even though they lost to San Fransisco, they still happened to play there, and we even got to see a World Series win here in the metroplex. So the Rangers started this run of championship games.

Of course the Dallas Cowboys were absolutely horrible this year. Fortunately, their owner, Boss Hogg, happened to build a Death Star on the ground in Arlington in the form of Cowboys Stadium. Because of this, the NFL in all their wisdom, decided to have us good folks in D/FW host the Super Bowl, with Fort Worth getting the AFC and Dallas getting the NFC and Arlington getting the game. And yes I was out in Fort Worth the night Big Ben was buying rounds at Pete's Piano Bar, and no I was not at Pete's.

The Dallas Stars ruined an opportunity for a sweep. They had to win the last game of the season, and they came out as gutless as they come and got beat. So there was no playoff hockey in Dallas this year.

Fortunately for American Airlines Center, the major under-dogs to do it, the Dallas Mavericks have marched their way to a 2006 rematch with the hated Miami Heat, and let's be honest no one wants to see the Heat win this thing. Well except maybe the NBA front office and all the officials. Because none of them want to see Cuban's team win. Just as they did five years ago, the shitty officiating will have Wade, Bosh (who's from Dallas) and super Douche Nugget Lebron James (personally Steve Carell had a much better "decision" than James) on the line any time they have the ball and someone is breathing on them.

Either way, D/FW has this year hosted the World Series, the Super Bowl, and the NBA Finals. Not bad for out small little town...

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Osama bin Laden

Minutes before Obama announces the news, I'm going to be taking bets on how bin Laden (pictured below) actually died.

1:1 Natural Causes
2:1 Killed by own men
6:1 U.S. Spec. Ops got him
10:1 He's not actually dead
15:1 Missile attack
30:1 Alcohol poisoning at the "Royal Wedding" this past weekend.


Update: CIA/U.S. Spec. Ops at 6:1 wins the day according to the POTUS.