Saint Patrick's Day

Ah, yes, St. Patrick's Day. While not serving as an official holiday in the United States, it is a holiday all the same. In fact, if you are awesome this holiday should be considered one of your favorites, if not your favorite of them all. I, Captain Awesome, have St. Patrick's Day on the level of awesomeness with Halloween, and when I say Halloween, I'm referring to the adult version of course...

What is appropriate to do on this holiday you ask? Well, anything that is awesome is acceptable, but there are a few guidelines of importance that you should follow. I consider myself an expert in the celebration of this cherished holiday.

Today I want to educate you on drinking obligations and issues that arise on this date. You see, many people think that drinking anything is acceptable as long as you put some green dye in it. This is not the case at all. A miller lite with green dye is NOT an acceptable beverage on March 17. And before you ask, neither is a bud light with the previously mentioned green dye. It is an accepted practice here in the states to partake in Irish festivities with American beer and spirits, and I aim to stop that blasphemy.

To help you learn how to truly partake in these festivities, I am going to compile a list of drinks that are acceptable on this blessed day named for the patron saint of Ireland.

Here are the beers:

1. Guinness (Draught and Extra Stout)
   
2. Killian's Irish Red
3. Smithwick's Irish Ale
4. Murphy's (Irish Red and Irish Stout)
   
5. Harp Lager
6. Beamish Stout
7. Kinsale Irish Lager
8. Kilkenny's Irish Cream Ale

Here are the beer mixtures (some of the mixed beers will not be Irish):

1. Black and Tan (Guinness and Bass)
2. Half and Half (Guinness and Harp)
3. Patriot Pint (Guinness and Sam Adams Boston Lager)
4. Dark Side of the Moon (Guinness and Blue Moon)
5. Irish Anarchist (Guinness and Murphy's Red)
6. Irish American (Guinness and Budweiser)
7. Irish Canadian (Guinness and Molson)
8. Irishman in Texas (Guinness and Shiner Bock)
9. San Patricio's (Guinness and Corona)

Here are the spirits you can enjoy:

1. Jameson
2. Bushmills
3. Bailey's Irish Cream
   
4. Tullamore Dew
5. Carolan's Irish Cream
   

And of course you can take the mixture of an Irish Whiskey and an Irish Cream in a shot class and drop it into half a pint of Guinness and there you have the infamous Irish Car Bomb. Enjoy.

I hope this information is helpful to you in your St. Patrick's Day celebrations. Someone spilling your beer on you is also a good reason to fight and be angry (see picture). Remember to be in awesome in your celebrations you have to make sure you are enjoying the proper tasty beverages. If you make your way to Addison, TX tonight, swing by Sherlock's Bakers Street Pub or the Flying Saucer and you can celebrate with Captain Awesome. Well party hard and stay awesome, maybe see some boobies while you are at it!